How To Be A Brat To Your Boyfriend

As a smaller lady, I have always had a tendency to offset the likely perception of myself as quietly subservient and accommodating with actions signaling the polar opposite, much like a terribly small man retaining a Napoleon complex to counter his stunted stature.

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Early on, I developed a cheeky attitude and a slight disrespect for all things “other people,” thanks to the strong combination of a solitary upbringing and the influence of a father who may or may not have suffered from short man syndrome.

I’d practice eye-rolls in the girls’ bathroom mirror when I was five years old, so I could incorporate them into the sarcastic confrontations and contempt I planned to levy on fellow kindergarteners at recess.

I was only motivated to continue my saucy ways as I grew in age and understanding of matters beyond me, myself, and I, some of which were matters surrounding race, sex, and their intersections, terrified that if I let up on the sass and misconduct for even a second, I would appease the biased and repressive stereotyping I felt I was constantly sprinting away from.


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Consider my key personality traits by the start of high school: a resting bitch face established by third grade, a reputation for being “nice but kinda mean sometimes” widely endorsed among friends and acquaintances by my tweens, and an overly strong impulse to express disagreement and criticism at the first opportunity. As uneasy as I am about expanding this very immature serial into the world of my sex life, there’s no doubt it’ll end up there.

In sexual interactions, I’ve nearly always assumed the role of the submissive, but the nature of that submission has evolved as I’ve learned more about what I enjoy and want. I’ve recently started to “brat.” “Brat” is defined as “a type of bdsm label, in which a sub (in most cases) enjoys misbehaving to the (dom, caretaker, etc.) for attention and penalties,” according to Urban Dictionary. I’d say that, depending on the partner and the situation, I now alternate between submissive and bratty conduct, with my actions frequently falling somewhere in the middle.

The innumerable occasions in my more distant past of slavish obedience to boys frighteningly eager about fucking my unmoving body, only convinced me of the hidden ubiquity of necrophilia, are very counterintuitive, I know, given my lifetime objective of avoiding any perception as a passive mute.

You see, just as I’ve never wanted to be perceived as a sub in general, I’ve never wanted to be viewed as a sub by only ever taking on that role in bed. I definitely had a yearning for something different during my more submissive period, something that gave me more power but not at the expense of the other party’s dominance. The truth is that I am more drawn to sexually powerful men who also desire to be in a position of slight authority. That urge was quickly identified as my desire to get control of the psychological playing field on which women have traditionally triumphed over the unreasonably emotional animals that make up the majority of humanity.

Bratting gives me a special kind of control, control on a more emotional level, that the other person can’t have without jeopardizing their physical advantage. This creates a sphere with two power gradients that are antiparallel to one another. And as I stimulate one with mocking, taunting, chuckling, and resistance, I provoke the other to become more vitalized, inspiring him to exert even more physical domination. I see my influence overrun his psyche and, in turn, unroll itself across the entire interaction, defining the honest course of events. His side of activity is just a series of physical responses to my snide comments and minor acts of disobedience.

It’s crucial to stress that this is my approach to bratting, both in terms of what I do and how I think about it, and that it’s not the only or official way to do it. These are the attitudes with which I consider brat play in my personal quest of the seemingly impossible scenario in which I get to have sex a guy exuding dominance uncompromisingly without having to act the part of a standard s-type. Many others take a very different approach, driven by completely distinct thought processes and personal goals. As a result, I extend a friendly invitation to try it for yourself not only to individuals who share my beliefs and interests, but also to anyone who believes they would benefit in some way from giving brat play a try.


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How do I stop being a brat in a relationship?

  • You will only make yourself (and your partner) miserable if you act like a brat.
  • If you’re terrified of losing control, don’t crush your spouse.
  • Sex is beneficial to a happy relationship.
  • Don’t just lay around all day; take care of yourself.
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    How do you tell if you’re a brat?

    We live in an age of child-centric families, according to psychotherapist Robi Ludwig, global parenting expert Katie Bugbee, and Nancy Samalin, author of “Loving Without Spoiling.” Permissive parenting has resulted in a generation of entitled children, whether both parents work and feel guilty for spending too much time at work, or they simply can’t tolerate seeing their children cry (or are too tired to deal with it).

    “When we’re too permissive, we usually end up bribing and appealing and eventually giving in,” Samalin explains. “It involves saying ‘No,’ but in a way that indicates ‘Probably not’ or ‘I’m not sure,’ which may feel lovely at the time but gives your child too much power.”

    What does it mean when your boyfriend calls you a brat?

    As Sue points out, it’s hard to tell just by looking at the word; context is crucial. On the surface, the term has a negative connotation: a “brat” is a spoilt child who whines, complains, and pouts when things don’t go his or her way. So it isn’t a compliment, by nature. However, I believe your boyfriend is attempting to tease you in a kind and even amorous manner. Him: Sweetie, let’s go see that new Brad Pitt film. ‘She’: (pretending to pout…. girls like to do that, you know) No, it’s too cold outside, and my feet get cold, and I’m not in the mood to put on makeup. He says, “Why, you little brat face!” (Because she’s being wimpy and girlie, and it’s sort of cute.) For that, I’m going to tickle you hard! For the balance, you can use your imagination….who needs Brad Pitt anyway?

    What do you do if you are a brat?

    Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, told a website, “Yes, the word ‘daddy’ can refer to a parent, but we also use it to refer to someone who is the boss, in control, a protector, or who is doing a fantastic job. In the bedroom, that’s usually the meaning women are aiming for.”

    How can I be a good girlfriend?

    When you’re a spoilt girlfriend, you’re in a real relationship with an older man who looks after you. You’ll meet each other’s families, friends, and coworkers since he’s your boyfriend.” The spoilt girlfriend, the regular sugar baby, and the rinsers are all there.

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